“Intuition is not linear” – a story about remembering
How I operate in this world
I have never been someone who was able to remember quotes from movies, anecdotes that were told, song or movie titles, I also forget band & musician names, actors too & I don’t even get how people can correlate certain songs to albums & specific years… this is magic to me.
When I had to, I was able to memorize things, e.g. during my studies. I think I learned to draw the 20 essential amino acids & every metabolic pathway hundreds of times, because of course: I forgot each time after the exam.
The only time I remember something for a long time is, if I am exposed to it in a natural way and when I am truly interested about learning it. I still know the metabolic pathways that I studied during my PhD for example. I remember my favorite Beatles songs too, cos I had a phase I only listened to them, however, I only know they were part of the red double-album my parents had.
Another factor of me remembering things is, when strong emotions are coupled to that. Then I remember situations, people, even supposedly unimportant small sentences that were exchanged. I can walk a certain path & have a flash of a conversation coming up that occurred years ago & be able to recall the silly topic we discussed & laughed about.
I also remember when something is said to me & causes a huge revelation inside of me, a type of shift & huge change of perspective. And this happened when I heard my teacher Elizabeth saying to me: “Daria, intuition is not linear.” BÄM! There it was, burned into myself forever and ever, the second it came out & hit me, I will never forget it anymore…
The situation we discussed was around me being, or thinking that I am, inconsistent. That I fluctuate, am all over the place, I am a mess & not organized… these were all thoughts, believes and concepts that were deeply ingrained in myself. I truly believed that these were the reality.
Whenever I would mention it to someone else, they were super surprised & usually described me as the complete opposite, as I always managed to achieve what I wanted. I studied, went abroad, did my PhD, started a company… how can all this be possible while being a mess & disorganized?
Somehow in my head I also always knew that it seems like I am all of these things, while at the same time manage to get stuffs done. It didn’t lead to me thinking that those believes were wrong, just that I had them AND managed to live my life.
When Elizabeth told me that “Intuition is not linear” it resonated so well with me. It fitted perfectly.
Why? Because I also know that I always have decided upon things with my intuition, listening to my perception, my feelings and emotions and these silent but strong intuitive hints that I felt in my body. Every time I went after them, everything turned out well, if I disregarded them, I faced troubles and unnecessary pain.
So for me, when this quote entered my space & resonated so well, I will never forget it anymore. It was like a perfect description and explanation why the way I do, perceive and act, might seem crazy or not-linear, but if it is based on my intuition, it is even normal that way.
My awareness about my intuition was quite high already before I even heard these words, afterwards it increased even more & I do everything I can, to increase my ability to listen to my quiet intuitive hints. They can come in different ways: sometimes it is an unclear feeling inside, an unease, sometimes it’s a thought that crosses my mind, it can be very tiny, but it is coupled to an intensity that resonates in my whole body, sometimes it is a smell I perceive, sometimes a fluffy, blurry impression I have.
I try to be as mindful about it as possible & register it. I also know if I keep my connection to my body as strong as possible, the likelihood that I miss such a hint decreases. I try to eat healthy, I avoid stress as much as possible, unnecessary pressure is something I avoid, I spend lots of time in nature, I do mantra meditation every day cos it clears my body, soul, heart & mind & it connects me to myself & my senses more strongly, I am mindful about the people I interact with, I avoid certain excessive exposures to specific topics, I connect to my dog as much as possible, cos she is a perfect mirror of my inner world.
By now to me, even though I am a scientist & logic, rationality & the mind have been trained & instilled inside of me, I dont care anymore if my intuitive hints make sense or not, if they are logic or not, understandable or not or if someone cant grasp them (in case they ask), cos I know that the perception of an intuitive hunch is so strong & clear, that I trust my body to know more than me. My subconscious works through my physical body & I am only limited inn understanding the perceptive capacities of it. The only thing I can do, is to trust it!
I would love to know how all this is for you? How does intuition express inside of you? How do you strengthen it?
Love,
Daria